Part 1: All About Character
Your Invitation to a New
Kind of Relationship Dance
What Does Dancing Have to Do with a Book About
Relationships?
~ Foreword by Carmen Valverde, Ed.D., Rutgers University
Understanding the Components of Can We Dance?
Part 1 ~ Dance Lessons: Preparing Yourself for
a Great Relationship
1 Basic Footwork: Understanding Character
Defining Character • Character Strengths and Growth Areas • Your
Dual Nature • The Power of Choice • Misusing Qualities • Wisdom
of Character Work
2 Your Part First: Discovering Your Own Character
Your Purposes in Life • Self-Observation and
Assessment • Some Assessment Skills • Understand
Your Inner Voice
3 Stepping Forward: Developing Your Character
Making the Choice to Change • Success in Changing • Developing
After Poor Choices
4 Slips, Trips, and Falls: Choosing, Learning,
and Moving On
Relationship Choices • Learning Lessons from
Experiences • Moving Forward • Confident
View of the Future
5 Gaining Confidence: Claiming Commitment
The Practice of Commitment • Fear of Commitment • Commitment
to Partnership • Building Commitment Confidence • Commitment
and Sex • Sex and Character • Saving
Sex for Marriage • Supporting the Choice to
Wait • Abstinence • Chastity
6 Both Eyes Open: Discerning Your Expectations
Expectations • Examining Unrealistic Expectations • Motivations
for Being in a Serious Relationship
7 Partner Possibilities: Determining a Match
The Discovery Process • Character Qualities in a Partner • Describing
Yourself and a Partner • Your Worksheets in Action • Expecting a
Partner to Change…or Not • Match or No Match
Part 2 ~ It Takes Two: Creating a Lasting Friendship-Based
Relationship
8 First Dance: Establishing a Friendship
Friendship-Based Relationship • Character
and Friendship • Your Circle of Friends • Beginning
to Share • For Careful Thought • Beginning
to Share
9 A Consistent Partner: Shifting to a Serious
Relationship
Becoming a Couple • Activities as a Couple • Being
in a Long-Distance Relationship • Feelings
of Love and Attraction • Practicing Equality • Positive
Relationship Signs
10
Dips and Twirls: Observing Your Partner’s
Moves
Understanding Observation • Observing Body
Language and Clothing • Observing Character • Observing
Interactions with Family • Observing Interactions
with Friends and Others • Observing Your Interactions
as a Couple • Observing Life Management Skills • Responding
to Negative Observations • Reflecting and
Processing Observations
11 Advanced Practice: Gaining Communication Skills
Active and Conscious Listening • The Meaning
of Words • The Way You Speak to Your Partner • Cultural
and Language Influences • Positive Words and
Practices
12
Intricate Steps: Sharing and Resolving Sensitive
Matters
Deepening the Relationship • Trust and Honesty • Backbiting,
Gossip, and Slander • Jealousy and Mistrust • Discussing
Sexual Experiences • Sexual Involvement
13 New Dances: Exploring Some Differences
Understanding Differences • Culture, Ethnicity,
and Race • Spiritual Harmony • Age as
a Relationship Factor • Role of Parents • When
There Are Children
14 Unified Movement: Preventing Communications
Missteps
Communication Challenges • Character and Communication • Misusing
Character Qualities
with a Partner • Improving Communication Patterns • Facts
or Interpretations • Maintaining Well-Being
15 Smooth Dancing: Strengthening Unity and Love
The Importance of Unity • Being a Couple • Five “Love
Languages” • Identify and Repeat What
Works • Prayer and Spiritual Reading • Humor
and Laughter • Staying Connected During Discussions • Communication
Guidelines
Part 3 ~ The Best Dance: Exploring Powerful Character
Qualities
Introduction and Instructions
Character Qualities
Acceptance • Assertiveness • Beauty • Caring • Chastity • Commitment • Compassion • Confidence • Contentment • Cooperation • Courage • Courtesy • Creativity • Detachment •
Discernment • Encouragement • Enthusiasm • Equality • Excellence • Faithfulness • Flexibility • Forgiveness • Friendliness • Generosity • Gentleness • Helpfulness • Honesty • Humility • Idealism • Integrity • Joyfulness • Justice • Kindness • Love • Loyalty • Mercy • Moderation • Patience • Peacefulness • Perseverance • Purity • Purposefulness • Respect • Responsibility • Self-Discipline • Service • Sincerity • Spirituality • Strength • Tactfulness • Thankfulness • Thoughtfulness • Trustworthiness • Truthfulness • Unity • Wisdom
The
Next Step ~ A Harmonious Dance: Considering
Compatibility
Appendices
A ~ Background and Research Notes
B ~ Sources, Copyright Notices, and Permissions
C ~ About the Authors and Publisher
D ~ Information on Marriage Transformation Books
E ~ Please Contact Us
Worksheets in Each Chapter
Part 1 ~ Dance Lessons: Preparing Yourself for
a Great Relationship
1.1 Understanding Your Character Choices
2.1 Assessing Your Character Qualities
3.1 Character Development Plan
4.1 Learning from Relationships
4.2 Cleaning Up Previous Relationships
5.1 Making Commitments
5.2 Assessing Your Perceptions and Commitments
about Sex
6.1 Understanding Expectations
6.2 Setting Personal Boundaries
6.3 Creating a Relationship Vision
7.1 Character Qualities in a Partner
7.2 Describe Yourself
7.3 Describe Your Ideal Relationship Partner
Part 2 ~ It Takes Two: Creating a Lasting Friendship-Based
Relationship
8.1 Appreciating Friends
8.2 Widening Your Circle of Friends
9.1 Doing Service for Others
9.2 Discerning Love for Your Partner
10.1 Learning from Your Parents’ Relationship
10.2 Practicing Observation Skills
11.1 Understanding Your Communication Patterns
11.2 Character Strengths in Your Relationship Partner
12.1 Assessing the Current Effect of Previous Relationships
12.2 Discussing Your Sexual Experiences
13.1 Exploring Culture, Ethnicity, and Race in
Your Relationship
13.2 Spiritual Exploration
14.1 Assessing Your Misuse of Character Qualities
14.2 Character Challenges in Your Relationship
Partner
14.3 Acting on Facts, Not Interpretations
15.1 Building Unity Effectively
15.2 Communication Guidelines
Return to the Can We Dance? page
Encouraging
Character Qualities
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