
Compassion
Compassion is having a genuine concern for others, a partner, and oneself, sensing the pain in difficult experiences, and wanting to take action to relieve it.
I am practicing Compassion effectively when I:
• Actively listen for the burden and pain others are carrying in their hearts, minds, and souls
• Support and comfort others when they are in trouble, injured, ill, or have made a mistake
• Hold someone’s hand while they are grieving
• Strengthen or empower others to relieve their own suffering
• Pay attention to my own inner pain and struggles and gently give myself time to heal
I need to strengthen Compassion when I:
• Keep a cold or uncaring distance between a partner and myself or with others
• Ignore others’ problems, feelings, or issues
• Judge others as weak or incompetent to handle their lives and problems
• Prevent others or myself from grieving or taking time to adjust to illness, deaths, failures, or traumas, and see grieving or the need for healing time as signs of weakness
I misuse the strength of Compassion when I:
• Overly involve myself in relieving the pain or responding to the needs of others and thereby neglect my own important responsibilities
• React to reduce someone’s pain too quickly without knowing all the facts and therefore cause more harm
• Quickly defend someone against a perceived oppressor without considering the whole picture
Spiritual Reflection: A man should not hate any living creature. Let him be friendly and compassionate to all.(7)
Can We Dance?, p. 414

Truthfulness
Truthfulness is communicating accurately in a straightforward way that conveys one’s best understanding of the facts.
I am practicing Truthfulness effectively when I:
• Promise a partner or others only what I can reliably fulfill
• Know and share my true self accurately and authentically with a partner and others
• Am careful and consistent with the accuracy of the words that I speak and write, which builds trust with a partner and others
• Fully investigate important facts independently and objectively before making decisions
• Speak what is factual in provable ways, and make it clear when I am voicing an opinion
• Admit to a partner and others when I make a mistake
• Share stories accurately and without exaggeration
I need to strengthen Truthfulness when I:
• Lie to or deceive others with false information
• Defend or cover up my actions with lies or partial truths
• Misuse my imagination or creativity to concoct stories so that they become inaccurate or misleading in order to gain attention from a partner or others, or to get what I want
• Slander the reputation of others or defame their characters
• Accept information from others without verifying its accuracy
I misuse the strength of Truthfulness when I:
• Speak the truth rudely, harshly, or hurtfully
• Backbite or gossip and defend my actions because the words are factual [See Chapter 12 for explanations.]
Spiritual Reflection: Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (54)
Can We Dance?, p. 461
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Character Qualities in Can We Dance?
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