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©2004 The Marriage Transformation Newsletter
Empowering people to create happy, lasting, spiritually-based
marriages—the foundation of a prosperous, unified world
Empowering people to create happy, lasting, spiritually-based
marriages—the foundation of a prosperous, unified world
| September 2005 |
Volume 2, Issue 8 |
© 2005
Marriage Transformation LLC
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Share the Gift of Love:
Price Reduction on Great Marriage Books and Products
Marriage/Relationship Warning Signs and Solutions
Listserves/
Newsletter Subscriptions
Note: Marriage Transformation is a trademarked term, and the project logo is copyrighted and trademarked. It may not be used for any purpose other than representing the Marriage Transformation Project.
"…the life of a married couple should resemble the life of the angels in heaven—a life full of joy and spiritual delight, a life of unity and concord, a friendship both mental and physical."
~ ‘Abdu'l-Bahá: Compilation of Compilations, Vol. I , p. 397
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“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. …Love never fails…”
~ The Bible, New International Version; 1 Corinthians 13:4, 5, 8
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"But indeed if any show patience and forgive, that would truly be an exercise of courageous will and resolution in the conduct of affairs.”
~
Qur'án , XLII-43
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Marriage Can Be Forever--Preparation Counts! Walking a Path to a Spiritually-Based Marriage
Learn the steps toward a happy, lasting marriage with this CD-version book that includes a facilitator's guide!
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Don't Spit on the Flowers! Great Ways for Young Adults to Care for Their Relationships
This tri-fold pamphlet supports young adults with the basics of a great relationship. Customize it for your organization or company!
The Marriage Transformation Project is a global social and economic development project committed to marriage education and marriage skill building for people at all stages of relationships. In addition to our own independent work in developing materials, we draw on the work of marriage researchers and experts. We also derive part of our inspiration and content from the teachings of the world's religions. These include the following faiths: Baha'i, Buddhist, Christian, Hindu, Jewish, and Muslim.
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We welcome new subscribers! Please share this! From Susanne Alexander and Craig Farnsworth Dear Friends: It may seem a bit odd to start a marriage newsletter talking about divorce... but here goes. The work of our project is in many ways about divorce prevention. We encourage singles to know each other's character and thoroughly explore compatibility before marriage, so they do not end up in a marriage that fails. We encourage married couples to engage in ongoing relationship enrichment so that they nurture love and unity. We saw these commitments in action this weekend at our two workshops in Ann Arbor , Michigan . Singles and couples fully engaged in learning whatever they could to support them in having great relationships. It was a privilege to be with them. (See a few of the photos at www.marriagetransformation.com/learning_workshops_AnnArbor.htm.) This month's featured book is one that has been out for awhile, but remains popular and still benefits your relationships and marriage. Michele Weiner Davis' Divorce Busting lays out an approach that one or both spouses can use quickly and easily to turn around a marriage that is struggling. She reminds us that even a small positive change one partner makes can have a profound and lasting effect on the marriage--change your marriage by changing yourself. She also stresses that divorce often does not solve problems and that it frequently only makes them worse, especially when there are young children and custody issues. Often couples do not need deep analysis of their issues and an airing of all the "wrongs." In fact, this often leaves couples feeling more hopeless. Weiner-Davis' approach is that most people are willing to change, they just do not know how. She includes in her book such guidance as:
We do not have room to share all the wisdom in the book, but we will share one more nugget: "Change does not have to be a laborious, painful, or lengthy process." (p. 91) However, change is required. If there is conflict in your relationship, doing more of the same will get you somewhere...the divorce court. (Additional resources are available at www.divorcebusting.com.) Loving greetings,
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Share the Gift of Love: Book Sale Anniversaries, special occasions, engagements, and weddings are wonderful opportunities to share the gift of love. Whether it is for a special couple in your life, or for yourself, relationship and marriage enrichment tools support and nurture every facet of our lives. Marriage Transformation LLC is committed to empowering people to create happy, lasting marriages. For a limited time, we are lowering our prices on many useful products to help support the relationships and marriages in your life. As an added bonus, each order will also receive a complimentary copy of What's Character Got To Do With It? Enhancing Sëxual Intimacy in Your Marriage, a fun and witty booklet that gives you 52 practical and creative ways to enhance intimacy in marriage! Check out these great promotions: The Pure Gold Wedding Package Pure Gold: Encouraging Character Qualities in Marriage (Second Edition) The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts The Love List: Eight Little Things That Make a Big Difference in Your Marriage Love Talk: Speak Each Other's Language Like You Never Have Before Show your friends, your loved ones, and yourself the importance of love, respect, and commitment. Order your marriage enrichment tools and wedding packages NOW by clicking on the above links or by visiting our online store at www.marriagetransformation.com/store.htm! Hurry! Products will go quickly and these low prices are in effect only through Sunday, October 2! All US orders will arrive by Sweetest Day (Sunday, October 16). Expedited service is available at an additional cost. Credit card and personal check orders may also be placed by telephone, (Office hours are generally 9:30 a.m. to 8 p.m. Eastern US time)
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Marriage (and Relationship) Warning Signs and Solutions It is our hope that, through marriage education, people will avoid divorce. As you assess the health and well-being of your relationship, you may notice a few areas of concern. Below are warning signs of relationship trouble to watch for and solutions to help you maintain a lasting marriage. Reflection Question: What indicates to you when your marriage is having trouble? John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and his team at the Relationship Research Institute in Seattle, Washington, have discovered a number of couple indicators that warn of trouble in a marriage (John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and Nan Silver, The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work). The warning signs paraphrased from the book are:
Reflection Question: What indicates to you when your marriage is doing well? Some Positive Marriage Practices
The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work (Gottman/Silver, ISBN 0609805797) additional suggestions:
Gottman and Silver say “...happy marriages are based on a deep friendship.” They define friendship as “a mutual respect for and enjoyment of each other’s company.” (p. 19) They also say, “These couples tend to know each other intimately—they are well versed in each other’s likes, dislikes, personality quirks, hopes, and dreams. They have an abiding regard for each other and express this fondness not just in the big ways but in little ways day in and day out.” (pp. 19-20)
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We are continuing to make strong efforts to spread the message about the importance of character in relationships. This month, we are happy to report coverage in the following publications: The News-Herald, September 11, 2005 First Years and Forever, September 2005 The Euclid Sun Journal, September 1, 2005 The Euclid Observer, September 2005 Comcast: Relationships Please see the Media Section on our website for ongoing news coverage.
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Character in Relationships and Marriage Make Your Marriage Pure Gold Marriage educators and spouses Susanne M. Alexander and Craig A. Farnsworth will guide married couples through group and couple activities and interactive discussions. Learn and explore the vital topics that challenge most married couples as you build a happy, lasting marriage. Topics will include family unity, spiritual practices, consultation skills, character, money, sëx, listening, time and service, and more. You are welcome to email topic requests to susanne@marriagetransformation.com. Required Book: Second Edition of Pure Gold: Encouraging Character Qualities in Marriage, available at the Bosch bookstore, through our online store, www.marriagetransformation.com/store.htm, or the Baha'i Distribution Service, 1-800-999-9019; (www.bahaibookstore.com). To get the most out of this weekend, Bosch requires married couples attend together and commit to attending the entire workshop. To register or get more details about Bosch Baha'i School, please visit their website at www.bosch.org. |
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International Marriage Conference
10th Anniversary Celebration Y Y Y 10th Annual Smart Marriages Conference
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Generic marriage-saving advice has no place in this book. Instead, you will find a step-by-step, nuts-and-bolts approach to getting unstuck and making your marriage loving again.
Inspirational and accessible, Divorce Busting shows readers in pain that working it out is better than getting out. (www.divorcebusting.com)
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Listserves Join our listserves if you want to learn more or become involved in marriage education! Join today and help transform marriages! MarriageTransformationEducator-Subscribe@yahoogroups.com Get the latest news about marriage and The Marriage Transformation Project as it happens! Join our announcement listserve today! MarriageTransformation-Subscribe@yahoogroups.com Did a friend forward this newsletter to you and now you want to receive your own copy each month in your email inbox? To sign up for this newsletter, go to our home page, www.marriagetransformation.com, and register in the "Newsletter Sign Up" box!
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Marriage Transformation™ Project
P.O. Box 23085
(216) 383-9943
P.O. Box 23085
www.marriagetransformation.com
Newsletter content
by Susanne Alexander and
Joyce Ashman
Newsletter Layout
and Design
by Joyce Ashman
by Susanne Alexander
Joyce Ashman
and Design
by Joyce Ashman